Disturb Us, Lord

Disturb us, Lord, when we are too well pleased with ourselves,
When our dreams have come true
Because we have dreamed too little,
When we arrived safely
Because we sailed too close to the shore.

Disturb us, Lord, when
With the abundance of things we possess
We have lost our thirst
For the waters of life;
Having fallen in love with life,
We have ceased to dream of eternity

And in our efforts to build a new earth,
We have allowed our vision
Of the new Heaven to dim.

Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,
To venture on wider seas
Where storms will show Your mastery;
Where losing sight of land,
We shall find the stars.

We ask You to push back
The horizons of our hopes;
And to push into the future

In strength, courage, hope, and love.

Attributed to Sir Francis Drake – 1577

I first read this poem several years ago. At the time I was settling back into life in the U.S. after several years living and working abroad in Mexico. It spoke to me about continuing to seek and live out adventure in my everyday, mother of three, suburban lifestyle. I wanted to keep growing, to keep running after whatever God called me to, even in the midst of a seemingly average life.

And now here I am 7 years later. Three kids still growing – one entering high school, one in middle school, one in elementary school. I have been both a working mom and a stay at home mom over the years. I am 3 years into a 5 year plan to complete a Masters in Divinity. I have no idea what God is going to do with it, but I firmly believe it’s something He called me to complete.

In the midst of starting my degree I prayed for answers to the questions of “Why do this now?” and “How are You going to use this?”. I prayed specific prayers based on what my limited sight and perspective could see at the time. I dared to dream of something small and specific and to ask God to fulfill that dream. And He did. He gave me answers that were close to shore. Answers that were beautiful in their time. But they were short lived and their end came with hurt and more questions.

I fought to stay close to shore, close to what I knew, close to where I had seen answers before. But doors shut, the tide rolled out, and over time prayers brought peace to move away from shore, to swim out a bit further, and seek abundance and joy beyond the shore.

I’m still swimming, still seeking answers, still prayerfully asking God what’s next, and trusting Him to carry us to the next shore when the time is right.

Waiting is hard. Swimming can be exhausting. Patience isn’t my strength. But my God has been faithful through every storm that life has brought our family’s way. And He will be faithful through this one as well.

He has disturbed us to dare more boldly, to venture on wider seas, and I believe that we will see His mastery when the time is right – when it’s His time and not mine.

And so I push into the future

In strength, courage, hope, and love.